The Day I Nearly Bought a Leprechaun Skeleton

Belgium has some of the best flea markets in Europe... not my words, the words of the Guardian. In its top 11 European flea markets, three are from Belgium. Here’s the evidence.

As you can see, at number five is the flea market on the Place du Jeu de Balle in Brussels, which is where I was headed on Saturday morning for some street photography.

The entire square is filled with junk. It looks like a refugee camp. There are very few stalls, instead the traders just roll out a blanket on the street and toss their tat in ugly piles. There’s no order, there’s no delicate arrangement - it looks like an eviction.

Just walking around the market can be difficult. The narrow walkways between the rugs are crowded and the items regularly overspill - not that the traders much care when their chipped china is trampled underfoot.

Creepy and sinister are just two of the words that spring to mind

There’s not much you can’t buy at the Place du Jeu de Balle. Similarly, there’s not much you’d want to buy at the Place du Jeu de Balle. Broken sunglasses sit alongside obsolete VCR players, Hitler youth knives, and knackered SLR cameras.

"Is this the one you wanted? The man in the shop said it's much better than those iPods."

Where TV remotes go when they die

A leprechaun skeleton, the perfect Christmas present for that special somebody

The strangest item for sale was this miniature humanoid skeleton in a glass case. With its little pot, it looked like a leprechaun's grave. The trader saw me taking photos and offered it for 50 Euros. When I declined, he readily lowered the price to 20. A bargain perhaps, but that’s how a lot of horror films start. I know my luck, the one time I buy a leprechaun skeleton it will turn out to be haunted and come alive at night to butcher me in my bed.

The flea market was fun. There might even have been some gold hidden under all the mounds of crap, but I don’t really have an eye for antiques.

Mmmm, you're a nice toilet brush

I don't know much about antiques, Bargain Hunters, but this beautiful, hand-painted seal figurine has got to be worth a punt. Cheap as chips

If you've had a tetanus jab recently, you might enjoy a rummage through these trays of rusty cutlery

This rug specialised solely in tangled wires for obsolete technology

After the fun at the flea market I went to meet Hannah at a British-themed tea shop called God Save the Cream (yawn). They served my tea in a thick porcelain beaker.... no self-respecting British tea room would try that trick. Sorry to sound like a fuss pot, but when it comes to tea only bone china will suffice.

Here’s a handy list (with maps and opening hours) of all of the major markets in the centre of Brussels. There are hundreds more outside the centre.

http://www.brussels.be/artdet.cfm/4984